I don’t talk to the people I follow because you’re awesome and I have an irrational fear of rejection.
earthnation: people who have the same name as me are competition
ejacutastic: i have childhood memories that i am not 100% sure actually happened or if i dreamed them i really do not know
20 Unbelievably Tiny Knitted And Crocheted Things →
Warning: Your whole entire heart is about to explode. Sorry.
If there is a God, He will have to beg my forgiveness.– A phrase that was carved on the walls of a concentration camp cell during WWII by a Jewish prisoner (via cottonbutts)
imaginelarrys: stylinsmut: im a hostess at a restaurant and my favorite thing to do is ask 14/15 year old boys who are out on dates if they want a kids menu i love you
coolscar: *accidentally opens undesired program* *heart races as i try to force quit before it can fully open*
tickettoheaven: chafing-nipples: dangermat: when bananas rot they secrete stuff that makes other fruit including bananas near them rot faster that’s so fucked up that is murder suicide bananas commit murder suicide that’s pretty fucking metal I’d say it’s pretty fucking bananas
the-yolocaust: the-yolocaust: has anyone ever finished a game of monopoly i now know why
catswithbenefits: i love 50 cent, or as he is known in Zimbabwe; four hundred million dollars
themongooseandthesnake: “yeah im a lesbian trapped inside a man’s body” the cishet male laughs as he highfives one of his dudebros. suddenly he gives off a look of pure terror and a piercing shriek as his skin is ripped apart, much to the horror of his crew. his skin falls to the floor and a woman is left standing where he once was. “FINALLY” she roars, kicking one of the dudebros in the dick...
professordumbeldore: professordumbeldore: do you have 67 protons because you’re a If anyone else reblogs this I will cry for eternity